Obviously, I am already in violation of my New Year’s resolution to go to bed at a somewhat earlier time each evening. I must remind any critics, however, that Rome was not built in a day. Although Venice was, from what I hear.

All too often lately I have found my mind slipping into familiar patterns – that acquiring some object or service will sort out life’s problems. For example, last week at work I got a memo about getting paid through Direct Deposit instead of picking up my paycheck at the office. My immediate reaction was, “They’ll put the money in the bank FOR me? Why, that will solve all of my problems!” My next thought was, “Why did I just think that? I can’t possibly believe that!” Clearly, life has more problems to throw my way than just those which may be solved by switching to Direct Deposit, and I am an intelligent boy and have no illusions to the contrary. However, just for that split-second, Direct Deposit seemed like the cement mixture that would transform the bumpy, awkward gravel road of life into a smooth interstate highway with no speed limit.

Now, why was this my first reaction?

I blame television. Television commercials have taught me that getting their product or service will unburden me of the undue stress of daily life. None of them actually say it, although it might make a good ad campaign: “Minute Maid Orange Juice will unburden you of the undue stress of daily life.” “Tampax tampons will unburden you of the undue stress of daily life.” “Epil Stop-N-Spray Hair Remover will unburden you of the undue stress of daily life.” “Smith & Wesson handguns will unburden you of the undue stress of daily life.” And so on.

Well, that last one might actually be true.