Creative Writing class journal entry from 6 December 1993:

What is the true nature of God?

Now, don’t strike me down to hell for saying this if it’s what you believe, but I think it’s pretty safe to assume that God is not a viscous blob of ochre gelatin.

It is my personal belief that God doesn’t look like a solidified object at all; I think that he’s just a big ball of light. If he does look like a human, though, I don’t think that he has any genitals. I’m using the word “he” with someone with no genitals. Great. God is a eunuch.

No, that’s not what I mean. I don’t know what I mean. All I know is that them damned religious T-shirts bug me. Which brings me to the conclusion that God exists in the form of a T-shirt.

No, that’s not what I mean. I don’t remember what I mean.

Daily Hey Magic Number: 36