Monthly Archives: October 2001

General
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Splop!

There is a leak in the ceiling here in the office where I work. On the floor just behind my chair, and hence getting knocked around by my chair, is a little blue recycling bin which has been positioned beneath the leak so as to catch the water. There are several other such leaks here in our office. We are counting down the days until the entire ceiling collapses altogether.

In other news, this page does indeed look screwy in Netscape. It also looks screwy in Opera, although in a slightly different manner. I do not believe I will pursue fixes for these idiosyncrasies. It is a pointless endeavor. Changing one bit will just screw up a different bit. So I have sold my soul to Bill Gates. He is a fiery hell demon! And I hear he picks his nose and eats it!

Fictishy, Metariffic

And so I finally step into the nineties

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I’ve worked out this webcam nonsense. It is taking little pictures of me every thirty seconds as I am sitting here writing this with a towel on my head, and before you go making any “towelhead” jokes, remember that I have just come out of the shower. I have nothing but respect for my Arab brothers and sisters. I have respect for all the people of the world. I am a respect slut. I’ll give it away to anybody. Why, just the other day, while I was walking to the Shop’N’Away to get a pack of Camels, I tripped over a shifty drug dealer who was taking a nap right there on the sidewalk. I apologized to him, gave him a hearty handshake, and asked him if he had any narcotics I could purchase. You see, even though he looked very skeevy, and not at all on the up-and-up, I respected him by offering to partake of a business transaction. Of course, it turns out that he was lying there dead, apparently from a stab wound to his nostrils, although you wouldn’t know it to look at him. At his funeral, to which I went in order to pay my respects, I spent a couple hours speaking to his mother about how, even in death, he seemed lively and vibrant and shifty; and when she pointed out that shifty isn’t a positive quality, I shared my logic that “shifty” was only a term that could be applied to someone who was very much alive. She gave me a hug, patted me on the head, and said, “You run along home now, son.” And so, to respect her wishes, I did.

I desperately need to start going to bed earlier.

Health and Body, Lucacentric, Media Studies, Metariffic, Television

Difficulties

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To celebrate getting the new page up, I spent all day puking. Well, that’s not really true. I puked twice. Once at home and once at work. I stayed at work for the rest of my shift and even had a bag of Doritos afterward. I am not too smart.

Watching an SNL rerun from the mid-’80s on Comedy Central with Rosanna Arquette as host, I have come to the realization that Rosanna Arquette and Sarah Michelle Gellar are exactly the same person, only in different bodies.

I have also been drinking rum. Again, not too smart. I am tempting the nausea gods.

I played around a little bit with some webcam software. You may see different funny little pictures up in the webcam space before I figure out the best way to make all this work. Hopefully by the end of this week I’ll have sent out the big email to everyone I know saying “Hey, everybody, come look at my site! It has mostly the same stuff on it that it used to have, but it all looks different now! Ha ha ha!” But, you know, I have to be *really* ready first.

So, more rum then.

Metariffic

Hooray!

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Looks like the file upload went off without too many hitches. Any links to the old URL should be redirected here automatically, if I have set everything up right. A couple of the archives sections play serious hell with the graphics, but I’m sure minor tweaking will take care of that. Haven’t looked at it in Netscape yet – I’m sure it will look shitty. Everything looks shitty in Netscape, except for shit – Netscape is that bad. The webcam, site map, and site FAQ features have not been implemented yet, there are some links in the “Drawing Is Fun” section that haven’t been activated yet, and the photo gallery in the “About Lucas” section is still being worked on. The only major thing I need to do now is go back through the archives and change the URL for every image so that the image appears instead of a little red X. But I will not do that now. No, I will not do that tonight, because I have to be at work in seven hours, and I have to sleep. No, I will not do it tonight. I can do it at work tomorrow. Yes. Tomorrow. Sleep now. Not tonight. Tomorrow. Sleep.

Metariffic

Let’s rawk and rowl

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Okay. The new page is just about ready to be put into place. There are just a few links that won’t be active yet, but pretty much everything is ready to go. In the next half hour or so, I will be putting the new files on the server, and taking the old files off. Which means you won’t be able to read this. But you will once the new files are back up, unless I fuck everything up. Wish me luck!

Metariffic, Screwy (fixit)

Forum no good reasonum

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Behold!

The Lucubus Forum!

Hosted at Delphi, where memberships are free, and advertisments are at a minimal annoyance level. Go there, join up, and post stupid shit. Nothing could please me more.

Oh no! Don Ho!As I sat tonight drinking a refreshing lime rickey, I received the following email message from my friend Sandy:

today, october 2nd, is a very special day. it’s palindrome day. for the first time since august 31, 1380 — over six hundred freakin’ years — the eight-digit representation of the date will be a palindrome.

10/02/2001. By gum, he’s right. He goes on to say:

i’d love to see who can come up with the best palidrome using their own name. the best i could do is “sandy, my DNAs!”, which admittedly makes little sense. surely you can do better….

I can do better. Not much better. But slightly better. “Cased Lucas, a cul-de-sac.” That’s the best I could come up with. You know, like, investigating real estate or something. Granted, it doesn’t make as much sense as “Sit on a potato pan, Otis” or “Satan, oscillate my metallic sonatas”, but I’ll take it.

Here’s some palindrome fun!