Have you heard about the Christ, Jesus Christ of Nazareth?
He’d been tacked up to a tree or something ? a cross, that’s it.
And anyway, the fella died, or anyhow, so it seemed,
Such a total shame, such a nice boy. Good speaker.

So his fans had been distraught, setting up their vigils and whatnot,
And it got a little crazy with the mourning. No, not in the morning. At night.
But then some drunkards got the idea of busting into his tomb.
And wouldn’t you know it? He wasn’t in there.

Well, perhaps his grave was robbed, his body taken from the place.
And that’s what they all figured happened. Right?
But others say, and I agree, he escaped death somehow.
He faked his death and got away!

I’m so happy about Jesus!
I’m so happy about the Christ!
I hope he has a nice life! I hope he finds a wife!
Never wanted him to die, oh no, not I.

Well, if he is alive, I’m sure he’s far from here now.
Far from this god-forsaken place.
With its cruel and unusual punishment ? am I right, people?
I bet he hopes he never sees a fucking cross again!

I’m so happy about Jesus!
I’m so happy about that Christ boy.

Daily Hey Magic Number: 93