New slang: adopt it

I have invented two new words and have already begun to incorporate them into my daily vocabulary.

When we feel like eating, we are hungry. When we feel like drinking, we are thirsty. When we feel like getting busy, we are horny. But what if we feel like going to the bathroom?

There is simply no delicate way to articulate this feeling. “I’ve gotta pee.” “I have to poop.” “I need to drop a deuce.” These crude expressions need to be replaced with new words that allow us to express our feelings without getting into the mechanics of the activity.

Enter shisty and pisty.

shisty [shih'┬Ěstee]
1. Desiring to defecate.
2. Having a sensation in the body wherein defecation seems imminent.
Example sentence: It never fails; an hour after eating a chili dog, I’m always shisty.

pisty [pih'┬Ěstee]
1. Characterized by or expressing a need to pee.
2. Having a sensation in the body wherein urination seems imminent.
Example sentence: The doctor asked for a urine sample, but I simply wasn’t pisty.

Take these words, and use them in good health. Try to work them into the conversation next time you are in a social situation. Definitely slip them in the next time you visit the doctor’s office. Together, we can do it!

Now that I have some great new words to use when such situations arise, I’ll have no qualms at all about telling everyone EXACTLY how I’m feeling! Why, I’m shisty right now! Wouldn’t you like to be shisty too?

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