George W Bush recently had a colonoscopy. He transferred the powers of the president to Dick Cheney while he was undergoing the procedure. What, he can’t be president with a tube up his ass? FDR had a tube in his ass for four straight terms! Well, three terms and a bit of a fourth.

Nevertheless, I am sincerely relieved that our president’s colon is in fine health. Now, let’s get to work on that tort reform, Mr. President!

Am I right, people?

Daily Hey Magic Number: 6