I am so very tired.

Microwave-reheated cheese fries smell alarmingly like vomit.

• Boxer briefs: the perfect compromise!
• Lots of good shows are on television!
• Pizza is good, but have you tried cheeseburger pizza?
• Doritos make you fart! Or at least, they make me fart!
• Super Mario Bros.: a *classic* video game!
• The Winter Olympics are certainly full of talented athletes!
• Comics aren’t just for kids anymore!
• Did you know that there are other kinds of videotape besides VHS?
• Jewish people don’t believe in Jesus!
• For fast internet service, try cable!
• You know who’s really stylish? Gay folks!
• With ‘emoticons’ you can express yourself without words!
• Dick Cheney is a knife-wielding maniac!

Hey!

“Fierce Grape” flavor Gatorade. Mm-hmm!

I’m making jello

Putting all your eggs into one basket will surely lead to fertility problems.

don’t mess with my toot-toot

moo hoo ha ha

get up get up get busy do it get up and move that body

Boom boom shaka-laka boom BOOM!

rum bum bum

Mixing vanilla-flavored vodka with root beer Schnapps tastes a bit like a root beer float, doesn’t it?

Short answer:

No.

Long answer:

Not even remotely.

This sentence is false.

um hey